Why are hararis confused about culture and Islam?

Why is it that many times through daily lives most of the Hararis living especially in US tend to confuse the rules of religion with that of culture?

#1 Wedding Ceremonies. One main point that harari people seems to be confused about.... Why in the world would a typical american, not to mention Christian culture be a part of a wedding ceremonies such as wearing a white wedding gown and ladies intermingling with men during wedding parties was never mentioned in hadith/quran; but yet, during nikah time women tend to be secluded.
Also, during nikah(marriage) ceremony most of the time, the process seems to be taken care of with the grooms presence and excludes the bride from even watching what goes on , im sure 99% of harari women or even men out there do not know what the Imam mentions or reads during nikah ceremony, but just there to sign a piece of paper which indicates they're "simply married"
It is absolutely OK for the bride to be present along with the groom during nikah ceremony but it seems that the Harari cultural aspects have manipulated the rules to exclude participation of the bride.

You are correct in saying we Harari's mix culture and religion. You are 100% incorrect in saying it is mostly with the American Harari's...

Our culture has confused the religious obligation of a marriage with our created customs... and these mixed practiced are predominantly practice back home. When the religion very simply requires a dowry ( prize gift) for the wife of some substantial value... we go overboard and add several other things, and the danger is if you ask a Harari what you need to make an Islamic marriage they dont know what is the religion or the culture. All the gold, money and clothes are not part of the religious requirements of a marriage, yet this custom has been part of our culture (which started back in harar) and confuses people with what is required from the religion.

How about "our music"... you say its an American thing but where are most of the popular Geyusu artists from??? Harar!!! Is it ok to be playing those instruments and singing about love and romance??... and how about all the dancing that goes on in the weddings??? That was not invented in America. That was adobted back home.

In retrospect, we Harari are better off than many other cultures in terms of mixing religion and culture... however, we must not let our cultural practices interfere with the true religious practices. If we know having men and woman dance together at a wedding is Haram (which it is), then why cant we put our love for pleasing Allah ahead of our pride (admiting we are doing something we should not)...

Rather than putting the blame on "American Harari's" ( when they are no more at fault that the ones back home), we need to unite as a larger Umah and ask Allah for the strength to do what is Halal and refrain from the Haram... being Harari does not give us a pass to paradise, being a true beliving and practing muslim does...

dear 1234

I totally agree with you, but I think u read the main point of my topic out of context. I was refering to the fact, hararis that live in America, Ethiopia or anywhere for that matter tend to imitate a Westernized cuture by wearing a white gown during wedding ceremonies and intermingling men/women when religion does not permit this action. Another question: Why are most Hararis so into the Westernized culture to a point they don't even know true ways of Islam????? If we take a survey most married/unmarried Hararis don't even know the Islamic rules of marriage,but yet they have signed nikah paper, or "agreed" to the rules of nikah.
May Allah show us all the right path.